Huckleberry

by Lemonjello Redenbacher on July 15, 2009

Normally I would not have added this, since it’s so far out there that I figured no one would really consider naming their kid Huckleberry.  It’s exactly why I have never mentioned that Penn (of Penn & Teller) has a daughter named Moxie Crimefighter or that Jason Lee has a kid named Pilot Inspektor.  The names are awful, but I know that they will probably be the only people ever to have these names, so I didn’t waste my breath.

Just this morning I saw TWO instances of kids named Huckleberry.  Both of them called their kids “Huck.”

If I could relay a shameful, lost look with incessant head shaking in writing, I’d be doing it right now.  Not only does Huck sound like a shoeless, overalls wearing, mouth breathing, wheat stalk chewing, backwards-assed little rednecked hick — it also rhymes with “fuck.”  And that, my friends, will guarantee some major league playground shennanagins.

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Natalie July 24, 2009 at 9:12 am

I don’t know- I really think this one could work!
Did you see the movie “Tombstone?”
Val Kilmer may have made this one slightly acceptable!
“I’m your huckleberry.”
Never mind he was an alcoholic in the movie.

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Lemonjello Redenbacher July 25, 2009 at 8:11 am

Huckleberry Hound is the only one that could pull it off.

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Yurik Hunt May 8, 2010 at 10:38 pm

Appropriate in Mark Twain’s time but not in the 21st Century.

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Artemis January 11, 2011 at 8:12 pm

I actually knew about Penn’s daughter Moxie Crimefighter before. Kickass name in a comic book, but not so much in real life… :)

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S April 27, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Bear Grylls (real name Edward Michael Grylls) from “Man Vs. Wild” named his kids Jesse, Marmaduke and Huckleberry. I love the show, but not his naming ability…*barf*

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Joules June 28, 2012 at 9:59 pm

I have one question for you. What do you mean by “mouth breathers”? Any way I look at it, I can’t formulate a possible meaning for that. Care to (genuinely) elaborate?

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Xenerick November 19, 2013 at 5:04 am

I didn’t know we lived in pre-antebellum world. Where that would be a fine name in a fictional book written by Mark Twain/ Samuel Clemens.

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A January 2, 2016 at 11:22 pm

I knew a Huckleberry. He was a crazy person at the public library. He was maybe in his 30’s , near albino, and would turn bright red while using the computers. I always had the bright red warning before he lost it and started swearing and throwing a tantrum at the computer.

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Huckleberry April 1, 2016 at 5:31 pm

This is very offensive

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